It would take you sometime before you realize or not that my name is the reversed version of my father’s name spelled backwards: Nomar-Ramon. As a kid, I did not question it. Aside from awkwardly repeating it whenever someone misheard it as Nomer or Norman and other variants of interchanging pronunciations. But as I grew older, I started to theorize my self-made concepts that unraveled the meaning and purpose of my life based on my name. Nevertheless, it bridged me to determine what I truly fight for, and justify my being.
The youth my father had is far different from mine. My father grew up in the slums of the urban poor communities in Manilla, from a family of 10 siblings. In contrast, my story developed in a typical household in the province of Batangas, from an ideal family of 4 siblings. Ramon struggled in a situation of, isang kahig isang tuka, whereas the opposite happened for myself, being spoon-fed with parents’ support towards my decisions in life. The fate my father had, dictated him the inability to finish education and resorted to employment at a young age. On the other hand, my parents paved the pathway for us to access education and hone opportunities. Two boys at different time periods, having upside down version of stories to tell, explaining the reversed version of each other’s name
In another universe, where my father can choose his life to live, he would have probably chosen mine, but life is not a grant-wishing factory. Reality is that we move forward and make sense of the present. That’s why on the 16th of August, 2002, the night my father heard my first cry, he strengthened his senses to provide this tiny bean a garden to sprout. Securing a life where I can fulfill what he failed to accomplish. As he would always remind us, perform well in school to avoid the recurrence of mistakes he had done before. Before, I belittled myself as someone weak and has no moving story to narrate. Stories about suffering and major challenges. Now, I came to discern that someone already walk that storm for the sacrifice of calm and serenity to his children.
By these internal realizations, I was able to solidify my identity, the roots of my aspirations in life. The only beam of hope Ramon was able to afford was to dream, but now I can put those fantasies into reality. I am my father’s dream. As he walks pass by these seemingly far-fetched institutions, here I am, a freshman for the University of the Philippines Los Baños. As he struggles inside the slums hoping for life improvement, here I am, in the College of Development Communication that aims for social change. From his youth under the marginalized sector of community to my youth of becoming a forefront student leader and has a power to mobilize development. Ramon’s blurry abstractions of perceiving life, was transformed to Nomar’s directed vision of success.
If time could break its dimensions and make it possible for these two boys to meet at the same time, what would be their message to each other? One thing that we have in common is our sense of humor, a trait that attracts camaraderie and trustworthiness. Both strengthened by each version of stories to tell, and both value the present and make the most out of it to thrive.
Understanding my name helped me define my identity and grounded me to set of principles that would navigate me towards my purpose. Reversed names can be funny but it can also be amazing especially if we disclose its context that may or may not be the original intention.
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